The Journal
10/07/03 : Woke up early. Gave Tuesday a steaming Hot Carl while screaming obscenities, wiped up and proceeded angrily to class.
10/16/03:
My girl came over yesterday evening and we decided to help save Mother Nature by partaking in a little hot BF action. Everything as going great, or so I thought. I was just about to eject the tape when I realized an overwhelming tightness and hot sensation overcoming my stick. I popped it out and was subjected to the worst sight imaginable! THE DREADED PINK SOCK!!! I didn't know what to do! I thought,"Hey, maybe she won't notice?". But it was clearly evident that she would. I mean, if you grew a six inch tail you'd notice, wouldn't you? Well, it took her about 15 seconds to realize the horrible disfigurement, she's a little slow. I never heard someone shriek the way she did that night. It was so loud a non-saddled Donkey Punch was in order to shut her up. I quickly took her unconscious, disfigured body to the steps near the entrance of the ER. Somebody will find her sooner or later, right?
10/27/03: My girl is finally home from the hospital. I gave her a call to see how she was doing and to see if she wanted to spend a little quality time with the Goochmeister. Apparently the connection was really bad because after saying "Hello" the phone automatically disconnected. I tried a total of 16 times and each time I was disconnected. I've got to have a talk with the phone company.
10/29/03: Decided to pay my girl a visit and tell her about the phone troubles I've been having. Plus, I wanted to get a look at the goods, if ya know what I mean. I heard she had some rather painful reconstructive surgery and I wanted to make sure UTANK was still going to be available for future use. I knocked on her door and a few seconds later it opened. There, standing before me, was my girl with crutches, holding an inflatable butt cushion. I was speechless! I didn't know what to say! Then it happened. I laughed. I just had to! I mean, how many times have you seen your girl with a roid cushion? Well, she didn't think it was as funny as I did because she threw the butt donut at me while slamming the door. I quickly yelled,"WHAT ABOUT UTANK???" but I didn't get a reply. She can't seriously be mad at me, can she? I did help her out by taking her to the ER. Well, maybe not "to" but surely close enough to count as "to". Other guys would've dropped that deformed chick off on Crack Street and high tailed it home, but not me! The Gooch don't play like that.
